The Tale of Two Tanks...

Tank jumps in the truck and proudly shows me his sticker which says, "My Teacher is Proud of Me!". He goes on to say that he was the classroom's "Top Banana" for the day. He got to lead the class whenever they lined up, sit in a special Top Banana chair, get first snack and feel like the top notch for the day. I took his picture. This is the calm little boy that his teacher goes 'ga-ga' for and has nothing but praise for...

And well....

This is the Tank that I know and love... the spaz!

That's my Tank.

Surgery Day~~~

Well, it's finally here!

I've been dreading (waiting) for three months!

Too long... just do it and get it over with.

So I'm off to lay on this "bed" that is like the size of a surf board...

oh this should be so fun!

I had Lance take pictures of the hairy~messy~arm last night.

I'll post them when I can upload a gruesome post-op pic.

(I know Lauri, TMI)

I'm posting it anyways to document my 'adventure'.

Big thank you to family and friends who are sending up prayers on my behalf.

I'm grateful~

Fire Drill? Seriously?!?

Tuesday, (22nd) I went in for my dreaded Pre-op appointment. My surgery is scheduled for Monday, the 28th. I went and saw the surgeon. He is nice. He told me the area being excised is not as big as his surgical assistant had told me. He said that it would MOST LIKELY not require a drain ~ thank you!!! No drain = shower after 48 hours versus up to nine DAYS!!!!!
I prepared a list of questions for him and ran through my list and then off to the anesthesiologist. I get all settled and 'preregistered' and the office assistant tells me a nurse will be with me soon and closes my door. Just then all these sirens start sounding off and lights flashing and I'm sitting in this room thinking... ummmmm am I supposed to leave or wait?!? Seriously like three minutes later a nurse opens the door and says, "We need to evacuate. This is a fire drill." She points me towards the back stair well and tells me to exit the building and stand by the reflection pool. ((((This is the new RiverSpend Hospital ~ hence the reflection pool.))))
I go into the stairwell and there are two floors above me that are all evacuating and the stairs are PACKED. I sort of stand to the side and wait for a lull and then join the herd heading down. I don't do stairs well and I felt like I needed to hurry so that I didn't hold anyone up. I go down two flights and a doctor steps in behind me. I'm still hurrying way too fast for my normal pace and he is making sighing noises like we aren't move fast enough for him. So I kick it into warp speed and move my legs even faster. We get to the outside door and my ankle gives out. I'm heading for the ground. I catch myself and try to walk further and it goes again. I turn to make sure I'm not holding up the precious doctor anymore and he is literally RUNNING the opposite direction. RiverBend is a 100% smoke free campus. Across the street is an undeveloped field where nurses, office personnel and the impatient doctor were rushing toward so they could squeeze in an unscheduled smoking break! What the FREAK?!? I'm killing myself so you can get a few puffs in?!? Not happy.
I hobble over to a lamp post and rest against it while I call Lance to let him know that my appointments are going to last a long time due to this lovely Fire Drill. (An air conditioning repairman triggered the fire alarm somehow while he was doing maintenance on a unit downstairs.) A woman approaches me and asks if I came from the Bariatric unit. I look at her confused and then it hits me... She wasn't a nurse or a doctor, just a busy body who should mind her own. So I say, "Why? Cuz I'm FAT?!? There's no other possible reason why I could be here at the doctor's offices except to go to have a bariatric procedure?!?" I know, I know... not my finest hour... but annoyed and offended. She looks at me a little frightened and stammers out an " Well, I just assumed..." Yeah, good times. News flash: Not a mystery to me or any other seeing eye human on this earth that I am a large woman. I am (as the nurse put it) medically BORING. I don't have to go to the doctor very often (knocking on wood). So let's not assume ~ turn off those judging meters and just let people be. Thank you... climbing off my soap box now.

Fire drill over. Now everyone is heading back to their desks, offices and appointments. I hobble inside and find the elevators with the throngs of people ahead of me. I wait and finally make it into an elevator. We are heading up and all these people on higher floors keep requesting to go down... ummm didn't you all hear the fire alarms? You shouldn't have been in the building. But we squeeze closer together and let them ride up with us. I get to my floor and let them know I need off and no one moves. I say it again and they sort of shift (like two inches) and now the doors are trying to close. So I just bust through the crowd and get out. Ugh... just move people!
I get back to the office and a nurse enters (the one that later proclaims my medically boring status) and on the appointment goes. My anesthesiologist is a member of the church and I know his wife. So he understands that I am a narcotic-free woman and it probably won't take much to send me off to dream land.

Now, I am all ready. Just need to show up on Monday. No food for thirteen hours before my surgery starts. UGH. No water/liquids after 9am. I'm not going to be pleasant to be around. Lance is probably secretly happy they check me in two hours prior to the big event so he doesn't have to endure a very snappy~nervous~hungry wife. Wish me luck...